I’ve been thinking recently about the evolution of my kayaking skill-set and felt inspired to jot a few words down. I started boating over 2 decades ago spending a long time paddling class III-IV. Over the last 7 years though, I’ve stepped up to class IV to V. The jump in skill needed is significant for just 1 grade higher. Rapids pose greater challenges and become exponentially more consequential; boat; body; blade position precision is not optional, it is essential. Mentally, the challenges increase and one is forced to constantly consider risk versus reward. The rewards are just fantastic though.
I don’t claim to be a gnarly boater, I’m defo not the one huckin’ huge (see the likes of the lovely Heather Herbeck and Christie Glissmeyer for that) and probing class V still scares me. But I’ve learned a few things along my boating journey and thought I’d share my ramblings. The article is divided into 4 sections. The order is a bit higgledy piggledy, but hopefully the content is of interest.

Photo by Mark Allen: Me on the Gronda, Italy
(1) On Confidence, Experience and Motivation.
Confidence comes from developing skills through experience. The more time on the water, the easier it is to assess and make good decisions in new scenarios from lessons learned in the past. Paddling hard rivers becomes slightly less scary the more you do it. I thrive on the heightened awareness evoked when I run class IV to V rivers. Every sense seems somehow more perceptive. This improves my paddling.
Besides the obvious of actually paddling the rivers, my skill development has comes from boating with people better than me; from coaching people who are less practised than me; from trial and error; from placing myself outside my comfort zone; from cross-discipline training; the list is possibly infinite. We may not realise it but we are populating our kayaking toolbox every time we don our kayaking gear and get on the water.
Having confidence and belief in ones ability is undoubtedly a good thing. However, I believe having an ego closes oneself off to learning – I learned this lesson the hard way in my teens and early 20’s, but I’m really glad I did. In being confident I am just wrestling the river; if I have an ego, I wrestle with myself too. That can be quite tiring for both me and my friends. It’s a fine line between confidence and having an ego and I reflect from time to time (as the skill-set grows) as to which side of the line I sit and adjusting if necessary.

Photo: Dave Porter firing up Big Bro, Oregon.
I will not run a river to brag I’ve run it. For sure, I’ve had my Kodak courage moments (when I was inexperienced and ignorant to risk). I’ve got away with it. I’ve also got hurt. I’ve been there, done that, bought the stitches. I’ve waited impatiently for injuries to heal. I’ve suffered the boredom and frustration that entails. Which brings me back to ‘risk versus reward’. I truly think that as far as extreme sports go, the older (or more experienced) I the wiser you become to this phrase. With age comes experience of injury, an appreciation of healing times and an understanding of longevity of the effects. Does that mean we take less risk the older we get or more experienced we are? I don’t think so, maybe we are just more conscious of it and how to assess it. Maybe experience of injury makes us better paddlers. In my case this is true, for other people, this may be utter tosh.
Personally speaking, kayaking is not about rivalry between fellow paddlers to push the limits of what is possible; though hats off to guys if they are doing that- they really will expand the boundaries of our sport. For me, boating is about challenging my boundaries. It’s about setting my goals and pitching myself against them. It doesn’t matter if I achieve them, what matters is that I’m motivated to try.

Photo: Tom on the Sorba slides, Italy
(2) On Shooting the Rapids
There are 3 things that I think about when I am faced with a white-water quandary. (A) Do I see a line, (B) Do I have the mental and physical ability to make that line (C) Can I, and where should I, set safety?
(A) The Line
Kayaking, for me is about respecting the river. It constantly provides clues as the how best to manipulate its waters. It is up to us to pay attention to details and use its intricacies to enable a successful decent. Experience, (sometimes our own, sometimes that of others) and possibly some research (a book or internet perhaps) provides a basis for choosing lines. Personally, I will look at a rapid for just a few minutes and pick my line. I will consider where I need to be and when, and use visual markers such as a tree or odd shaped rock to aid that recognition on the water. I have a rough idea of what key-strokes I need to place and their timing, but I do not over-plan; being adaptable to what’s presented before me on the water is just as important as the planning. Vigilant, I will often check with other group members on the line that they would choose and be open to changing my plan if I hear something contradictory. I will examine several areas of the rapid on the walk back to the boat, so I can easily spot them when on the water.

Photo by Dave Martin: Me on the Erme, Devon
(B) To Run or Not to Run
I know very little about extreme sports psychology and I try not to read too much literature on the subject- maybe I should; maybe I’m arrogant about my method- I tend to focus on the method that works for me. I do not use the spit test (if I can spit then I should run the rapid…if not then walk). I do not use the ‘imagine yourself in the third person’ method- it does not work for me. I’ve learned much from my own experiences and likewise by observing fellow paddlers approaches and listening to them recounting their stories. I use a straightforward approach. I literally just ask myself-
(a) Am I paddling well today and do I feel good?
(b) Am I calm?
(c) Do I think I have to ability to make the key moves?
(d) Am I free from performance influencing injury?
If the answer to all the above is yes, then I make the decision to run the rapid. If there is any hesitation, even for 1 split second, I walk around. Simple.
For all the points above, it is nearly impossible to de-convolute the mental from physical influences on the decision (even for (d), you can switch yourself off to pain). The two are synergistic in our sport. We all have an appreciation that kayaking is X % mental and 100-X % physical ability. It depends on the person as to the magnitude of X and it may vary significantly with frame of mind on any given day. I have chatted with people, on occasion, about a gender weighting to the X component but I think absolutely not; we are all just so intricate and individual that it is impossible to tell what the major influences on X are.

Photo: Stu on the Travo, Corsica.
(C) Safety, Please?
The higher up the grading you go, the harder it is to set safety- fact. My friends and I frequently joke as we prepare to paddle a class V rapid, “ Three teams of one then?” There is some truth in this- if something goes wrong you can often be on your own. The harder the rapid, often, the more difficult it is to protect and hence higher consequences and higher grading. We do always try our best to position safety where it would be most useful. For class V, this often involves setting up live baits. For everyone concerned, this is mentally and physically tiring but necessary. I try not to run anything that would put the team in any danger, should they need to rescue me. It’s just not worth it. We do our best.

Photo: Nicky on the Mellte, Wales.
(3) On team-work
When I was just kayak surfing and not boating rivers, I used to not place importance on team-work. It was often just me and the boardies, out there, on the Pacific Ocean swell. What could they do if someone went wrong for me? Chuff all. Swimming outside of the boat was not an option and this made me a very independent paddler, with a bombproof roll. It taught me to trust my skills and my judgement.
However, when I transitioned to rivers, I soon learned the teamwork aspect to our sport. It’s so much less tiring to divide the mental and physical challenges of scouting, probing, rescuing as part of a team. It builds trust. It builds close friendships. As team boaters we learn to trust our wellbeing in the hands of others and likewise take the responsibility of others upon ourselves. No-one wants to be a weak link in a team so we endeavour, as a mark of respect to our fellow paddlers, to keep up to date with rescue and first aid courses and keep up fitness levels. When things don’t go according to plan and the epic ensues, it’s the team we rely on to get us out of trouble. Everyone has something to offer the team. I think this aspect becomes so much more prevalent as you boat higher grades and its one of my favourite things about my kayaking adventures.

Photo by Moxy: Me on the Egua, Italy
(4) And finally…
Finally, as I sit atop a seal launch, or plonk myself in an eddy before pealing out into the current, ready to run a class V, I take a deep breath, slow my heart rate and say three things to myself (1) I have the skills to run this rapid, I’ve run similar stuff before (2) I will succeed (3) I will stay calm, focused; GET THE GAME FACE ON!
I guess that’s just about it for today…I think I’ve said enough. My opinions are based solely on my unique encounters and may have absolutely no similarities to anyone else’s. In conclusion IT’S ALL JUST ROCKS AND WATER and how we choose to experience them is up to us.