About Me
You want to know more about me? What are you, a stalker? A pervert? Get out of here. Don’t make me get my river knife.
Still here, eh? Just keep your hands to yourself, and we won’t have any problems. Here’s the scoop. I was born in 1979. All accounts of my birth lead me to believe it was quite the traumatic experience. Drugs were administered, my mom screamed, and I cried. Yes, it was a harrowing incident.
A series of life events controlled by myself and the universe eventually brought me to the whitewater mecca of northeast Tennessee. College degrees were obtained, full-time job garnered, got married, decided to not have kids, and had a vasectomy… The American Dream.
How did I start kayaking? I went to buy a flatwater kayak, but the salesman talked my wife and I into whitewater kayaks. The effects of this decision have been indelibly stamped on the whitewater rivers of the southeast. I am primarily a creek boater or a creek swimmer. I prefer creek swimmer, because any pansy can get down a class IV creek with a boat, but swimming it while trying to hold on to a boat and paddle… that takes skill.
Swimming isn’t my only skill. I have an uncanny knack for getting lost on the way to a river. I have had more surgeries on my shoulder than your 102 year-old great-grandmother. However, I love the river and meeting people who share my love for the whitewater. If you are in the NE Tennessee area, shoot me an e-mail. I’m happy to show you down the local runs. Who knows, maybe we can get lost on the way to the river, you can witness some great carnage, and always be able to say, “It’s not that bad, I saw someone swim it!”
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